I have a calling.

Way back almost 7 years ago on our wedding day, my Sweet Husband and I were running errands for the evenings’ upcoming festivities. Some friends of ours, Dave and Steph, were with us at our favorite grocery store doing last minute vegetable shopping. We warned them not to wander to near the wine department as my ex-boyfriend worked in that department. My friends know said ex-boyfriend and didn’t particularly want to run into him, unless it was with a truck or my friends’ wheel chair so they stayed clear, for the most part. Steph was confined to a wheel chair due to a recent bunion surgery, but still managed to do a few one legged hoppy dances later that night.

The avoidance of the wine department was noted and they gave us these instructions, “If we get to close to that part of the store, call out loud enough for us to hear ‘Whoop-whoop’.” Well of course we can’t just shout out “whoop-whoop” in loud booming voices when a perfectly fitted falsetto voice will do. So with one eye on them and their rolling wanderment and the other on gathering veggies, one or both of us would spontaneously call out, ‘whoop-whoop’ in a cheerful high falsetto, when we saw them straying into enemy territory. Upon hearing the ‘whoop-whoop’ the wheel chair being pushed by Dave would swerve in the opposite direction nearly knocking Steph on her proverbial can and head back to the DMZ.

This little routine continued as we shopped throughout the store all the while avoiding the wine department. In later years it was a happy day in our lives when ex finally left that store to go to who cares. We were now free to actually buy wine in that store and not avoid one of the best beer sections in town.

The art of ‘whoop-whoop’ has progressed into any everyday occurrence for Sweet Husband and myself. This sound can mean anything from ‘where are you’, ‘I’m here now’ or even just to make notice of the other one of us in the room. Sweet Daughter responds to ‘whoop-whoop’ and even the cats respond. And by respond I mean not look up or acknowledge us in any way, yes the cats or Sweet Daughter.

I have come to realize that the rest of the world is not privy to our ‘whoop-whoop’ call. On more than one occasion I’ve been on the receiving end of a raised eyebrow when searching out Sweet Husband at the local home improvement store. But we never say it loud. In fact whoop-whoop carries way better than my regular voice, which doesn’t travel past the end of my arm.

So imagine my surprise one day when I go into the Wine Department and I see Woop Woop Wine. Woop Woop. In the wine department. That’s got to be a sign. A sign, to one, either buy more wine or get out of the store. So I did this, I grabbed a bottle and hightailed it out of there, right after I found Sweet Husband. Whoop-Whoop!!

5 thoughts on “I have a calling.

  1. This is too funny. My kids and I use “ca-caw ca-caw”. I don’t know that I could ever buy any Cacaw Cacaw Wine, though.

    Woop Woop Wine sounds much more fun.

  2. I love that story! I use your calling card every once in awhile. Although one store ‘story’ I also remember is YOU tossing dry beans over the shelves to the next aisle. Which has nothing to do with this story, I just wanted to tell on you….then there is the toilet paper story. I got a million of ’em.

  3. Now if you had gone so far as to say that you also came up with a dance to your WoopWoop-ing…I would’ve demanded a youtube clip on the spot.

    Great story!

  4. How funny! Let us know how the wine is. Whoop-whoop is so much easier to do than madly whispering my husband’s name under my breath and seraching all over the store for him.

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